99% of people with ADHD experience RSD, and many find it to be the worst aspect of our condition. Much worse than The Disappearing Phone. It causes unbearable darkness & shame that blights our lives.
Wow 😮 I think you need to include people who have psychosis, schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder as well when you discuss this particular dysphoria, because it’s really common in people with this condition and it triggers full episodes frequently. On this platform I have only found one person so far who writes about schizophrenia from the perspective of having it (The Manic Messiah) as well as a couple of lovely people who are caring for family members (Lala Indie Maker and David McGee). This is an interesting crossover topic for me. I’ve always been a bit spaced out from a young age, a big reader but a bit slow to catch on socially, a bit like there was a pane of glass between me and everyone else is how I would describe it, a mild indication that my perception was neurodivergent perhaps, but in a way unique to schizophrenics. I’m proud to be one, by the way, even if I am the first person ever to say it 🤗
Thank you for this suggestion. You make an excellent point that there needs to be more awareness of the struggles that those with other ND conditions face. However , I wouldn’t personally write about any perspective other than ADHD & Autism, as I can only talk from my perspective
So much of this hits home. At times I'll have this intense anxiety about what a message or email is going to say so I end up ignoring it for days, weeks, even months at a time before opening it and seeing that it was nothing to be concerned about - which then makes me angry with myself for not reading it sooner!
I have all this but it starts the moment I try to make contact, like message one of my adult children. The fear of saying something wrong or being annoying starts my RSD before the message is even sent. Visiting in person brings on panic attacks beforehand. I'm usually fine whilst with them but it returns afterwards. This is with caring family members. I can't even think about having friends 😕
Your latest article on Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) provides a comprehensive and empathetic exploration of a topic that affects many, especially within the ADHD community. Your ability to break down complex emotional experiences into understandable insights is truly commendable. Thank you for shedding light on this often-overlooked aspect of neurodivergence.
Oh wow! Now my problem has a name :D The emoji thing and replying to texts is so true....I just asked my brother the other day as to why he would reply with a👍when I typed a 💖....
I am sure you will get it.
Also I am constantly looking for tone and vibes. If I am not at ease being myself and 100% unconditionally accepted, the relationship is going nowhere.
The part about letting go off someone who has been a total dick to you even when your PFC is telling you that it is the right thing to do.
Jeanie, thank you so much for taking the time to write this article! It has been super helpful for me. At 58, I have only recently been diagnosed with combined ADHD and then found out about RSD which has explained so much. I’ll definitely be focusing on your coping hacks! Thank you! 🙏 🤗
I love this. RSD is such an important topic. It’s something I’ve struggled with my whole life thus far, and I felt so relieved when I discovered it had a name and its own identity. Thanks for writing this awesome piece. Where did you find the stat of 99 percent of adhd people having it?
I have this but didn’t have a label for it. I attributed it to my Borderline, so it’s interesting to learn it’s an ADHD thing too (which I also have). Being left out of invitations can make me feel like I’m actually drowning. However, I’m pretty much always down for constructive criticism!
Yeah, hard relate on the RSD front. I think I'm much better at being cool with myself, but there are still times when I go from zero to "the entire world hates me" in seconds. The "be kind to yourself" is the best advice for me. It's not like it magically goes away because we know it exists...but that self awareness helps and helps me to be cool about it. Thanks for such an insightful read!!
Oh do I feel this... Every word! I, too, am an ADHDer with RSD. It's really terrible. Thank you for sharing your story. Just knowing there are others out there really helps.
Wait... This isn't just a "normal human response? 👀 It's an option for people to NOT spiral into feelings of shame and low self-wprth at perceived rejection?
In my experience, there's a difference between "perceived rejection" and "legitimate rejection" and you may get the same personal/emotional/physical response from both, but RSD is especially bad in circumstances where there isn't any true rejection at all, because then there's the added reactions from people who don't understand. Plus, there's a lot of logical fight that happens with "perceived rejection" because you may know in some circumstances, that *logically* people aren't avoiding you, or excluding you, but the response to the rejection is still just as harsh.
Wow 😮 I think you need to include people who have psychosis, schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder as well when you discuss this particular dysphoria, because it’s really common in people with this condition and it triggers full episodes frequently. On this platform I have only found one person so far who writes about schizophrenia from the perspective of having it (The Manic Messiah) as well as a couple of lovely people who are caring for family members (Lala Indie Maker and David McGee). This is an interesting crossover topic for me. I’ve always been a bit spaced out from a young age, a big reader but a bit slow to catch on socially, a bit like there was a pane of glass between me and everyone else is how I would describe it, a mild indication that my perception was neurodivergent perhaps, but in a way unique to schizophrenics. I’m proud to be one, by the way, even if I am the first person ever to say it 🤗
Thank you for this suggestion. You make an excellent point that there needs to be more awareness of the struggles that those with other ND conditions face. However , I wouldn’t personally write about any perspective other than ADHD & Autism, as I can only talk from my perspective
Oh yes, the dreaded RSD! I wrote about this and 'Trash Can Shame' a little while ago, those are my most difficult ADHD traits to deal with 😬
💯 the worst !
This is the first time I hear a word for this awful feeling
Now that you know the name and nature of your opponent , you can start your journey towards gaining the upper hand 💜
So much of this hits home. At times I'll have this intense anxiety about what a message or email is going to say so I end up ignoring it for days, weeks, even months at a time before opening it and seeing that it was nothing to be concerned about - which then makes me angry with myself for not reading it sooner!
I relate to that so much!!
Wow. I had no idea . Now there’s a name that fits
I remember my wow moment when I learned what RSD was !!!
99 % of us suffer with it yet the medical model denies it, it’s excluded from the DSM, and so we are not informed about it at the point of diagnosis
So we have to amble along , suffering, not knowing what’s wrong , not knowing why we feel this way.
It’s actually outrageous. I’m glad you now have a name for what you feel.
Good luck on your journey 💕
I have all this but it starts the moment I try to make contact, like message one of my adult children. The fear of saying something wrong or being annoying starts my RSD before the message is even sent. Visiting in person brings on panic attacks beforehand. I'm usually fine whilst with them but it returns afterwards. This is with caring family members. I can't even think about having friends 😕
Your latest article on Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) provides a comprehensive and empathetic exploration of a topic that affects many, especially within the ADHD community. Your ability to break down complex emotional experiences into understandable insights is truly commendable. Thank you for shedding light on this often-overlooked aspect of neurodivergence.
Oh wow! Now my problem has a name :D The emoji thing and replying to texts is so true....I just asked my brother the other day as to why he would reply with a👍when I typed a 💖....
I am sure you will get it.
Also I am constantly looking for tone and vibes. If I am not at ease being myself and 100% unconditionally accepted, the relationship is going nowhere.
The part about letting go off someone who has been a total dick to you even when your PFC is telling you that it is the right thing to do.
I am one work in progress...
Loved your article. You get a 💖
Jeanie, thank you so much for taking the time to write this article! It has been super helpful for me. At 58, I have only recently been diagnosed with combined ADHD and then found out about RSD which has explained so much. I’ll definitely be focusing on your coping hacks! Thank you! 🙏 🤗
I love this. RSD is such an important topic. It’s something I’ve struggled with my whole life thus far, and I felt so relieved when I discovered it had a name and its own identity. Thanks for writing this awesome piece. Where did you find the stat of 99 percent of adhd people having it?
I have this but didn’t have a label for it. I attributed it to my Borderline, so it’s interesting to learn it’s an ADHD thing too (which I also have). Being left out of invitations can make me feel like I’m actually drowning. However, I’m pretty much always down for constructive criticism!
Yeah, hard relate on the RSD front. I think I'm much better at being cool with myself, but there are still times when I go from zero to "the entire world hates me" in seconds. The "be kind to yourself" is the best advice for me. It's not like it magically goes away because we know it exists...but that self awareness helps and helps me to be cool about it. Thanks for such an insightful read!!
Oh do I feel this... Every word! I, too, am an ADHDer with RSD. It's really terrible. Thank you for sharing your story. Just knowing there are others out there really helps.
Wait... This isn't just a "normal human response? 👀 It's an option for people to NOT spiral into feelings of shame and low self-wprth at perceived rejection?
This is such a helpful and clear article, really well written ❤️ thank you!
I never knew what this looked like.
But how do you reconcile this for Autists or AuDHDers that really are disliked by the general populace (because neurotypicals hate autistics)?
In my experience, there's a difference between "perceived rejection" and "legitimate rejection" and you may get the same personal/emotional/physical response from both, but RSD is especially bad in circumstances where there isn't any true rejection at all, because then there's the added reactions from people who don't understand. Plus, there's a lot of logical fight that happens with "perceived rejection" because you may know in some circumstances, that *logically* people aren't avoiding you, or excluding you, but the response to the rejection is still just as harsh.