Us neurodivergents often struggle to connect with, interact with and maintain friendships with Neurotypicals.It can feel like there's a glass wall between us.
I think this is a fascinating piece of work, and I certainly identify with some of those categories. I'd make 2 observations. Firstly, all of your categories tend to imply the issue is with *us*. And secondly (and not entirely unrelated), sometimes I don't like socialising with NTs because they are so damn boring. I really, really don't give a crap about many of the things that seem vital to them, and I don't see why I should waste my hard won leisure time in faking interest when I could be doing genuinely interesting stuff.
Thank you for your message. My angle certainly was not that the problem was with us, I thought I’d made it clear that my feelings are the opposite is true
Wholly agree with you on the boring part. When I said we find them unstimulating , that was me being diplomatic 😁
Oh I hear you!! And I agree fully, which is why I was surprised you thought that I was saying we are the problem. I am very much of the perspective that the problem is *not* with us!!!
A other truly excellent article on an important aspect of neurodiversity.
As you mention, finding kinship with other neurodivergent people is vital to a sense of belonging out there for those of us who are neurodivergent.
It's not that we necessarily prefer to socialise with fellow neurodivergents, it's just that it is so much more comfortable to do so, for the reasons you state - and therefore these feel like more worthy friendships and more likely to be long lasting than with neurotypical people.
I know you will never think it yourself - due to your beautiful humility - but it is to your credit, Jeanie, that it is you who have created this sort of environment where so many of us can feel LIBERATED for possibly the first time in our lives.
Lovely article - a perfect summary of how I personally feel about the subject you are writing about - so thanks for giving this topic such clarity 🙂
I'd always felt the same way about NTs, until I decided to surround myself exclusively with NDs. Geez, what a shit show; I won't do that again. Sadly, too many of us NDs also have C-PTSD and are easily triggered. Projections, misunderstandings, avoidance of essential conversations that could have cleared up those misunderstandings... While I don't always feel like I belong with NTs, at least they seem to be more reasonable and less triggered. Curious what's been other people's experiences on this...
I hadn’t realized some of these issues were linked to ADHD. My first post (a true story I wrote) talks of my disdain for ‘stupid rules’ as I call them! Another sign that I am, indeed, ND.
I think this is a fascinating piece of work, and I certainly identify with some of those categories. I'd make 2 observations. Firstly, all of your categories tend to imply the issue is with *us*. And secondly (and not entirely unrelated), sometimes I don't like socialising with NTs because they are so damn boring. I really, really don't give a crap about many of the things that seem vital to them, and I don't see why I should waste my hard won leisure time in faking interest when I could be doing genuinely interesting stuff.
Thank you for your message. My angle certainly was not that the problem was with us, I thought I’d made it clear that my feelings are the opposite is true
Wholly agree with you on the boring part. When I said we find them unstimulating , that was me being diplomatic 😁
I'm sorry, I was feeling particularly 'accused' when I read your piece. I didn't mean to come across so strongly but, well, you know...
It is a real point of contention for me though, just the fact that standard neurodiversity is perceived as a disorder can get me riled :D
Oh I hear you!! And I agree fully, which is why I was surprised you thought that I was saying we are the problem. I am very much of the perspective that the problem is *not* with us!!!
A other truly excellent article on an important aspect of neurodiversity.
As you mention, finding kinship with other neurodivergent people is vital to a sense of belonging out there for those of us who are neurodivergent.
It's not that we necessarily prefer to socialise with fellow neurodivergents, it's just that it is so much more comfortable to do so, for the reasons you state - and therefore these feel like more worthy friendships and more likely to be long lasting than with neurotypical people.
I know you will never think it yourself - due to your beautiful humility - but it is to your credit, Jeanie, that it is you who have created this sort of environment where so many of us can feel LIBERATED for possibly the first time in our lives.
Lovely article - a perfect summary of how I personally feel about the subject you are writing about - so thanks for giving this topic such clarity 🙂
I'd always felt the same way about NTs, until I decided to surround myself exclusively with NDs. Geez, what a shit show; I won't do that again. Sadly, too many of us NDs also have C-PTSD and are easily triggered. Projections, misunderstandings, avoidance of essential conversations that could have cleared up those misunderstandings... While I don't always feel like I belong with NTs, at least they seem to be more reasonable and less triggered. Curious what's been other people's experiences on this...
Absolutely agree!! It’s definitely not smooth sailing with us either!! A fact I very much acknowledge in my follow up post on ND + ND friendships
https://jeaniegee.substack.com/p/neurodivergent-neurodivergent-friendships
I hadn’t realized some of these issues were linked to ADHD. My first post (a true story I wrote) talks of my disdain for ‘stupid rules’ as I call them! Another sign that I am, indeed, ND.